some stuff I forgot

Hard to believe I left anything out, right?

Slept worse than usual...when I wake up I blog in my head. I had to get up at 6 today so I didn't do this but in the future I am going to just come down and write it while I think it, I think I will get to sleep better.

First..that was a long blog so I am not up for re-reading it pardon me if I did mention this stuff, I feel like I forgot.

The night of, just hours before....I found out she was religious. I said "Why didn't you tell me that months ago? I would never have accused you of cheating with her..I KNOW you would never be with someone religious"....No comment from him. It kills me how easily he kept a straight face while lying.

Ugh...see now I forget what I forgot. There was more. Not necessarily even about the affair. Just points I wanted to make but think I got to rambling and never made the actual point I intended to.

Last night, I slept about 2 hours, woke up  at 2:30 and then couldn't sleep. Finally fell back asleep and the cat woke me with her hacking at 4:30. Then I knew I had to get up at 6 and was having a hard time falling back asleep. I started having stomach cramps, I slept a bit (had a nightmare--second one) and gave up at 5:45. I guess nightmares are my new thing, had one camping too.

The overthinking is in full force now.

Well it's time to head for work. Feeling pretty good about today. But it is still dark out, the light could change that...

Oh yeah....I remembered the notes I wrote..to put in his wallet, to put with his lunch. I was doing every thing I could think of to be that wife he wanted. If that wasn't enough we will never make it, because I gave all I have. I need the why.